Toonami Mid-Year Update 2017
Hey guys! Welcome to the first and, if the ratings are any indication, possibly last Toonami Mid-Year update!
Well, we're half way through the year and we've certainly been through a lot, haven't we?
We've seen the run of Jojo's Bizarre Adventure, the modern adaptation of a 30-year-old manga that finally got brought over to the States. And now America finally realizes how...trite and dated the story is. But hey, it had rock music!
We also saw Sand Whale and Me, which...I'm sure someone found amusing.
And we saw Gundam Unicorn!
*crickets chirp*
But hey, I think we all know who really stole the show. Yeah, you all know what I'm talking about! The follow-up and conclusion to the beloved childhood classic, that needlessly added a bunch of blood to it, Samurai Jack! A show that left so many lingering plot threads that totally warranted a 10-episode finale. Now some of you may feel we got gypped with the Guardian story line and the rushed battle against Aku (like, those were the only two things they had to do), but hey, Jack got some poontang! ...With a girl 50 years younger than him! ...That's what we all wanted, right?
......
But hey, let's look to the future. Toonami's still going strong, though they they did just lose the 11:00 slot again. So we're just going to have to get more with less, and we've got a great lineup ahead of us. Consisting of...
Samurai Jack reruns
Ghost in the Shell reruns
Dragon Ball Super reruns
Dragon Ball Z Kai, which is just glorified DBZ reruns
Wow. All those reruns sound really enticing don't they? "But do we have anything new" I hear you asking? Well, I'm glad you asked!
First we have Season 2 of Attack on Titan! You know, that show that was really popular back in 2014?! Well, they finally got around to making the second season. And all your favorite characters are back, including...
Boy, there sure are a lot of serious characters on this show, huh? Well, giant naked zombies that look like political cartoons are serious business after all!
But if Attack on Titan isn't edgy enough for you, we've also got the second season on Tokyo Ghoul! Because...apparently Toonami was really really hoping this would take off. So I hope you liked the first season, because second season is sure to have lots more blood and violence and gore and blood......that's really all this show has going for it.
And if you need a break from all that brutality, Toonami's got you covered with their most recent acquisition, Lupin III! You remember Lupin? The Japanese cultural icon that they aired on Adult Swim once already and it went absolutely nowhere? Well, they're bringing it over again. And I'm sure this time it'll be a huge success!
So that's quite the schedule, but what lies in store for the future of Toonami?
Well, we've got the recently announced second season of Iron Blooded Orphans coming in October. Since, you know...it's the one Gundam series that didn't completely bore us out of our skulls.
We've also got Jojo's Bizarre Adventure: Stardust Crusaders, so now everyone can finally understand all those weird memes.
And, of course, there's also the upcoming sequel to a 15-year-old anime that no one asked for, FLCL2! Will it live up to the original, or will it be a disappointing mess that completely misses the point that FLCL was supposed to be a fun, brief, self-contained story?
......
Well, beyond that, the future of Toonami seems uncertain, but there's plenty of potential candidates for new shows. Will we get My Hero Academia, which, by all accounts, should be on daytime television? Will we get the hackneyed living diarrhea that is Fairy Tail? Or could we get Tiger and Bunny since Toonami waited too long and they have no other options?
Well, only time will tell. Until next time, keep watching Toonami Mind Slaves!
Well, we're half way through the year and we've certainly been through a lot, haven't we?
We've seen the run of Jojo's Bizarre Adventure, the modern adaptation of a 30-year-old manga that finally got brought over to the States. And now America finally realizes how...trite and dated the story is. But hey, it had rock music!
We also saw Sand Whale and Me, which...I'm sure someone found amusing.
And we saw Gundam Unicorn!
*crickets chirp*
But hey, I think we all know who really stole the show. Yeah, you all know what I'm talking about! The follow-up and conclusion to the beloved childhood classic, that needlessly added a bunch of blood to it, Samurai Jack! A show that left so many lingering plot threads that totally warranted a 10-episode finale. Now some of you may feel we got gypped with the Guardian story line and the rushed battle against Aku (like, those were the only two things they had to do), but hey, Jack got some poontang! ...With a girl 50 years younger than him! ...That's what we all wanted, right?
......
But hey, let's look to the future. Toonami's still going strong, though they they did just lose the 11:00 slot again. So we're just going to have to get more with less, and we've got a great lineup ahead of us. Consisting of...
Samurai Jack reruns
Ghost in the Shell reruns
Dragon Ball Super reruns
Dragon Ball Z Kai, which is just glorified DBZ reruns
Wow. All those reruns sound really enticing don't they? "But do we have anything new" I hear you asking? Well, I'm glad you asked!
First we have Season 2 of Attack on Titan! You know, that show that was really popular back in 2014?! Well, they finally got around to making the second season. And all your favorite characters are back, including...
Serious guy
Serious girl
Other serious guy
And serious blonde guy
Boy, there sure are a lot of serious characters on this show, huh? Well, giant naked zombies that look like political cartoons are serious business after all!
But if Attack on Titan isn't edgy enough for you, we've also got the second season on Tokyo Ghoul! Because...apparently Toonami was really really hoping this would take off. So I hope you liked the first season, because second season is sure to have lots more blood and violence and gore and blood......that's really all this show has going for it.
And if you need a break from all that brutality, Toonami's got you covered with their most recent acquisition, Lupin III! You remember Lupin? The Japanese cultural icon that they aired on Adult Swim once already and it went absolutely nowhere? Well, they're bringing it over again. And I'm sure this time it'll be a huge success!
But that's not all Toonami has to offer! Did somebody say long-running shonen anime that will never end?! Well, in addition to the aforementioned Dragon Ball shows that our nostalgia boners will keep going into perpetuity until we're all dead, we've also got...
Hunter x Hunter. The show written by an unabashed slacker who is obviously making everything up as he goes.
And Naruto Shippuden, which is 163 episodes into its 500 episode run. That means we're 33% of the way through, all you Naruto fans. ......This is all your fault.
But hey, at least they got rid of One Piece, right?
So that's quite the schedule, but what lies in store for the future of Toonami?
Well, we've got the recently announced second season of Iron Blooded Orphans coming in October. Since, you know...it's the one Gundam series that didn't completely bore us out of our skulls.
We've also got Jojo's Bizarre Adventure: Stardust Crusaders, so now everyone can finally understand all those weird memes.
And, of course, there's also the upcoming sequel to a 15-year-old anime that no one asked for, FLCL2! Will it live up to the original, or will it be a disappointing mess that completely misses the point that FLCL was supposed to be a fun, brief, self-contained story?
......
Well, beyond that, the future of Toonami seems uncertain, but there's plenty of potential candidates for new shows. Will we get My Hero Academia, which, by all accounts, should be on daytime television? Will we get the hackneyed living diarrhea that is Fairy Tail? Or could we get Tiger and Bunny since Toonami waited too long and they have no other options?
Well, only time will tell. Until next time, keep watching Toonami Mind Slaves!
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